For those of you new to this blog (which, given our site traffic, would be pretty much anyone reading this), Wednesday is the day we knock off ten games with one or two sentence explanations. Enjoy!
Team USA Basketball – The problems with trying to make a realistic and challenging game about a basketball team that routinely won its games by 50 point margins ought to be pretty self-evident.
Last Action Hero – Beating up Jose Canseco lookalikes and dudes with greasy mullets (and the two are by no means mutually exclusive), has never been less satisfying.
Exosquad – Impossible to control AND it’s based on anime?Where do I sign up?
Cyberball – In the future, football will be played by robots, and humans will be reduced to appearing as little animated football players in between commercial breaks on Fox telecasts.
Arrow Flash – The horizontal shooter is a pretty basic concept, which just goes to show that Rennovation can fuck up at ANYTHING.
Gadget Twins – Sorry if this makes me a bad “game journalist”, but there’s just no way I’m going to play a game about a plane that shoots down other planes with a spring-loaded boxing glove for more than 10 seconds.
Uncharted Waters – Exploring unknown seas in search of a faster route to the clearance aisle.
Bubsy 2 – Yes, believe it or not, somebody actually played the first Bubsy and thought “Gee, I sure wish Accolade would make another one of those!”And if I ever find that guy…
G-LOC: Air Battle– Apparently air wars are won not by acheveing strategic objectives, but rather by simply meeting quotas for enemy planes shot down.
High Seas Havoc – In terms of design, it’s a pretty obvious rip-off of Sonic, except not nearly as good.And in terms of Sonic rip-offs, it’s nowhere near as blatant as Socket, so that’s a fail on two counts.