Truxton

For the most part, Truxton is a fairly typical vertical shooter.Not really great, not really bad, just kind of average and nothing you haven’t seen before.Well, except for two things.First, it’s also pretty easy for as shooter, as evidenced by the fact that I didn’t get killed in the first 10 seconds.And second, this is your special “big bomb” type weapon:

FREAKING AWESOME. Not awesome enough for us to keep pretending this game has a shot at cracking the Top 100, but at least worth some acknowledgment.As far as Stryker and I are concerned, the world needs more gigantic laughing skulls surrounded in lightning.They should be in more games.Hell, they should be in more non-game related stuff, too.

Imagine what the enemy pilots must be thinking.They must piss their pants every time that happens.The ones that don’t get instantly exploded, anyway.And the strategic problems it creates for enemy commanders -I mean, this ship is already wrecking havoc over your entire space force, throwing down a kills-to-deaths average of about 1000 to 1, thanks mainly to your pilots’ brilliant tactic of brainlessly flying directly into the line of fire.You finally come up with a diversion plan, where one of your ships sneaks up behind it, and just as he gets close and is about to open fire – Bam!A giant skull appears out of nowhere and kills the hell out of your entire fleet.Talk about an instant morale killer – that’s like finding out that wooden stakes don’t kill Dracula so much as they turn him into an exploding nuclear bomb.

And just think of the everyday uses for something like this.You’d never lose another argument.I mean, who argues with somebody that can conjure up a giant skull out of thin air?Just imagine the next Presidential primary debate, and all the other Republicans are picking on Ron Paul for being the only person outside of the really crazy-filled sections of Wyoming that wants to go back to the gold standard, and he could just be like “Oh yeah?You don’t like the gold standard?GIANT FREAKING SKULL!” and he makes one of those babies appear right in front of the moderator’s table.“Who likes the gold standard now?!That’s what I thought!”Honestly, the practical applications are limited only by your imagination.

Bottom line:We really like giant lightning skulls.Truxton, not so much.

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